Sorry that I haven't been posting too much lately. Things in these parts have been kind of busy and generally just fucked up. I finally got around to taking that open book final exam that I mentioned last week. It was only 25 questions instead of 50. My teacher is damn lazy. The test was ckock-full of confusing wording on the questions and typos. I ended up getting an 88 on the test. It took me 19 minutes. I got 3 questions wrong. One was because the question's wording was impossible to understand and the other 2 I got wrong for the very same reasons. I know this sounds like I am placing the blame on someone else, but it's really true. I don't care. I shouls get an A in the class regardless. I also finished up my final design project yesterday. The assignment was to do a self portrait collage without using any pictures of yourself. Mine is filled with horror movie imagery. I even worked a pentagram into the picture. Apparently I am a Satan-worshipping zombie, wno enjoys being vegan, being born on Halloween, and listening to punk and metal.

For those of you who keep track of my Father's ever-worsening health, it has taken yet another turn for the worse. He has now been diagnosed with Dementia. In essence his brain is dying. It looks like he will more than likely be quite possibly slipping into Alzheimer's disease at some point. Kind of sucks when you realize that your Dad is going to slip away right before your eyes. His Diabetes is also out of control and if his blood sugar is not controlled soon, he will more than likely have another heart attck or stroke. Worse yet, he could go blind or lose a limb. Things are not looking good, to say the least.

My Grandmother also has a leaking heart, a condition which has recently grown much worse, and it appears as though she does not have too much longer left on this fine planet. I should be more upset about this but unfortunately I'm not. I am much more concerned with my Father's health and all the future joy that is sure to bring. I hate to say it but she's my Dad's Mother and he spends way too much time worrying about her, and not enough worrying about himself. She basically lost her will to live when her husband died in 1976, and I think that her time might finally be approaching. It kind of sucks to say, but if the stress of dealing with her ends (she is very, very hard to deal with), my Dad's condition might improve. That is all I want. It sucks when you have to proioritize how you view people's lives.

Hope everything is good on your respective ends of things.

Alright, which one of you sorry motherfuckers signed me up for The Verve Pipe's mailing list. I actually took the time to check my email for that Dylan site, and low and behold I am now on their mailing list for concert dates. Oh please won't someone come to their Ferndale, MI show with me? They're playing at the Magic Bag Theatre, which of course is the only place any self-respecting musician would play when in Ferndale. I really hope that someone did sign me up for this, because it is a damn funny joke. More than likely it is just a mix-up on The Verve Pipe's end. I figure that since they no longer have a career, their drummer and bassist probably handle the website, while the singer answers all of the emails they receive (approximately 2 per month). By the way if any of you can't make the Ferndale show on April 25th perhaps you can make one of these other Michigan shows:

THE VERVE PIPE - LIVE
SATURDAY, MAY 11th
HOLLAND, MI
Holland Civic Center
150 West 8th Street Holland, MI 49423
Phone (616) 355-1130

THE VERVE PIPE - LIVE
SATURDAY, JULY 20th
ST. JOSEPH, MI
VENETIAN FESTIVAL

I think the Venetian Festival on 7/20 is actually in celebration of venetian blinds. So if you have any questions about your blinds, or are thinking of switching from shades to blinds, please feel free to write down any questions and submit them to Abraham 'Bubba' Weininski at the North gate upon arrival.

Times are apparently not looking up in The Verve Pipe camp. Are you boys having trouble getting shows outside of Michigan?

For those of you who care, you can check out a brand-spankin'-new Bob Dylan website (designed by me of course), right here. It came out pretty well. It was a REQUIREMENT to design the site using MSFrontpage, so when you look at the code (If you do) and notice that it was designed using this program, please forgive me. In other Community College news, I feel obligated to reprint a portion of an email I received from my teacher. Here it is:

"Due to the unpredictability of the weather, and the lack of cool air (or any air for that matter) in our classroom, I have gone ahead and posted the Final Exam (your FrontPage test). I am concerned that additional lost classroom time could wreck havoc with our exam schedule....Since many of you will opt to take the exam early, this means we will not be reviewing for the test. Therefore, I am going to allow this be an open book test. Since this is the case, I expect everyone to get an "A" on this test!"

First off the air-conditioning has been broken for 1 1/2 months---I know the budget is tight but give me a break. To my teacher all I have to say, is thanks for making me work for my grade. I really appreciate what you have taught me. As you can see, I have a lot of incentive to study for the exam. My book has a glossary and I will have 2 hours and 15 minutes for the exam. I think I can probably handle this. To be perfectly honest I am insulted that I paid for this. The only redeeming part of this class, is that it has allowed me the oppurtunity to publish directly to the school's server---that's it.

I am thinking about stopping Community College and beginning my own home-study program. What do you kids think?

I really don't like winter much, so I generally spend the winter months wishing spring would arrive. You've heard of spring--temperatures in the 70's, rain showers etc... Why the hell is mid-April and 95 degrees? This just isn't right.

In other new I am almost done with my web-project. While somewhat generic, it will probably get me a good grade.

So last night I get to class and am sitting there waiting with about 10 of my classmates for our teacher to arrive. After 15 minutes someone from the college comes in and says that our class has been cancelled. We were told that our teacher tried to contact all of us earlier in the day. That is bullshit, since I was home all day studying for the test and received no phone call or e-mail. I get home and email my teacher to see if our test will now be given next week, she emails me back and says that the test will not be given at all. Why the fuck did I bother studying? Community college is certainly a waste of my time and energy. I think I am going to start teaching myself what I need to know. This is ridiculous; in this class alone we have been sent home early 3 times and had class cancelled 3 times. The classes move way to slowly and I don't learn anywhere near enough. Here's some advice for you Community College Kids out there. Take out some loans and go someplace else. Of course your experiences have probably been better than mine--so ignore what I just said.

I have a test tonight and no motivation to actually study. This might be a problem.

The restaurant I work at had a wine tasting for the employees today. I went because it was required. I don't really like wine all that much (no matter how good they tell me the varieties/brands I am tasting are). It all tastes pretty damn near the same to me. I actually prefer cheaper wines to morte expensive ones. They mostly have a less powerful flavor. It's hard to serve me $30/bottle wine when I would rather be drinking Franzia right out of the box. I guess that's part of this whole white-trash thing I've got going on. It was worth it though because when I got home some CD's I got on Ebay were waiting for me. The CD's are Judas Priest 's Greatest Hits, MC5's Kick Out The Jams, and Helmet's Meantime. I am listening to the mighty Priest right now. I want to put on some leather and pump my fist in the air. Maybe give somebody 'the horns'.

I won a sweet Motorhead t-shirt on ebay last night. It kicks ass. I found a dude who not only says what size the shirt is but actually gives the measurements across the chest, and from shoulder to hem. What a great idea. This worked out really well too because he was selling 3 of the same shirt, all brand new, and all size medium. Each shirt had completely different measurements. I think that shirt manufacturers should have to use standardized measurements or some sort. In other totally unrelated news; my first web site (other than this one of course) will be available for your viewing pleasure within the next 1 1/2 weeks. It is a Bob Dylan fansite (like there aren't already enough of those). It looks good so far. I took the easy way out and I am using Frontpage instead of writing all the code outright. I am lazy. I did however design all the graphics for it which most of class will not be doing. I better get a fucking A. I woduld have written all the code but there is honestly no incentive to. Our grade will be the same regardless, and the 'teacher' is even encouraging us to stick with Frontpage. I'll put up a link when it's done.

Just got home from work. Time to go watch the episode of the Osbournes that Kim so kindly taped for me last night. I hope that it's good. Maybe next time they can use Dee Snyder of Twisted Sister's family. That would probably be much less interesting though. Dee never did drugs or drank so I am sure that he is much better equipped to dicipline his children and carry on a conversation. Not quite as good for the ratings.

I just presented my 3rd project in my design class. I am proud to say that my teacher asked if she could keep my project to use as an example for future classes. I know it's really not that big of a deal, but it is the first time I have received any proof that I am actually...good. She even wrote on my critique page that she 'loved it'. Awesome. I must add though that she is pretty easy to impress.

I have been trying for 3 days to access Blogger and was unable to do so until right this moment. I know that all of you have been wondering how I've been. The answer is: fine. Kim's parents were in town this weekend and that was enjoyable. I just got home from work which was not so enjoyable. I have a bunch of class stuff do over the next few weeks and I am really not looking forward to starting any of it (much less completing it). I would much rather be watching television. Free cable has really put a dent in my reading time (i.e. I really don't read anymore). One good thing about free cable is ...Skinemax. Why you ask?--- because it provides me with quite a bit of entertainment. The other night I was watching it when I caught a glimpse of something strange in the woman's vaginal region during one of the many pseudo sex scenes. What was this foreign (or not-so-foreign) object? A tampon string. Shouldn't someone have caught this before the cameras started rolling? I don't know the name of the film, or else I would certainly share that information, so all of you could see it as well.

The high temperature today is suppossed to be 79 degrees. I know that is officially spring because I woke up sneezing at 6 AM this morning. This is the first time I have ever done this. I took some Benedryl to stop the sneezing but now I have a really bad case of medecine head. I'm really tired, but at least I'm not sneezing.

Here is someting for you all to ponder: T-shirt Sizing. Does anyone remember when you could purchase t-shirts that fit correctly? For example, a size medium was actually a size medium (not a x-large in disguise). Perhaps you even remember the days when you could find shirts that fit through the chest and shoulders but didn't come down past your crotch in length. Boy do I miss those days. Here is an open plea to all the t-shirt manufacturers reading this; please make some shirts that fit normally.